In the comments section of my previous post, one of my wonderful new Lokean friends expressed delight at my level-headedness throughout this perfectly confounded situation. At first, I didn’t think anything except what a totally awesome compliment it was (thanks, btw), even if inside I was in turmoil. But, I continued to project that sense of security in myself, and in my decision making abilities, because, after thirty years of life I am positive that crying only works for babies.
To anyone who doesn’t know, I’m on a path of Sacred Queenship. It’s what I am. It’s what I do, and my Work for Apollon and the other gods is, and has always been, a reflection of that archetype. Strength and Sovereignty are qualities that the Prince himself has drilled into me. That is why he wasn’t/isn’t upset with my decision to allow fair play between himself and the Trickster.
Obviously, he’s confident in his ability to retain my complete devotion. I could expect no less from Apollon. But, more importantly, I’m confident in myself, and my ability to choose well. I am what Apollon has shaped and moulded, after all, and I’m doing exactly what is expected of me.
To take control, and to rule over all would-be obstacles; to set them into a useful motion by transforming any seeming disadvantage into an advantage. Another way of looking at it, might be to say that I make the unwelcome situation work for me, often by skillful negotiation.
A Queen must be focused and reserved, quickly using wit or charm to cut through to the heart of a matter. She must be aware of the weight of her words, and the length of her glances. And for me, in this situation, I must never forget that Apollon sees more, and farther than I.
I take my title seriously, with all its implications of noblesse oblige. Therefor, I must conduct myself accordingly. Which means, of course, no more whining and no more tears. What do I have to cry about, anyway? I’m loved, and all I’ve ever wanted was to be loved.