Category Archives: Loving Apollon

Time’s Not a River

Time is not a river
It’s an ocean
A place so full and vast
That no shore can be seen
And on its waves
I sail in my little ship
Built from planks of love

Bobbing from the motion
Of Time untamed
Everywhere I look
I see Time
Flowing back onto itself
Twisting and churning my little ship
The ship we built together
In a Time so far gone
yet always near

Our ship of love
And pleasure

Floating on the Time it takes
For a single word to land
On distant shores

But remember
There is no shore
Only the ocean
of our Time together
Pulling us under
As the ship we built crashes
Upon the cresting waves
of our separateness

Forcing two into one
Forcing us whole
Forcing us to relive
All the Time that’s passed
The Time that always is
And never will be
A tranquil Time
On our ship
Sailing

© 2017

Intangible

There are times when I grasp

For the meaning of You

When I hope to tear

Molecules from the air

So they may explain what You are

 

To me

 

In my want

And in my need of You

 

For You see

Only the elements

In their most stripped down

And vulnerable form

Can truly understand

 

The depth of You

The layers of You

The many flavors of You

 

All intertwined in a cacophony

Of delicious Godhood

 

Apollon

 

The Mirror and the Reflection

The Master and the Destroyer

The Alpha and the Omega

 

Potential and Consequence

 

All and One

 

Beloved

Brother

King

 

© 2017

Onward, Toward Phoibos

Things are changing in my cozy little world with Apollon.  I’ve gotten comfortable, I’ve gotten used to the ways in which I have related to Apollon for these last seven years.  Knowing Him has always before been like riding the edge of a massive storm, or being sucked into it. He has been harsh, never mincing His words or holding back in His actions.  He’s taught me so much under the epithets I’ve primarily interacted with Him as.  But, although those parts of Him are still here and are still of great importance to our unique relationship, now is the time for them to step quietly back, and to allow a new aspect to receive my primary devotion.

It was a year, perhaps two years ago, that I received an oracle from one of my Sisters, wherein Apollon had announced His intention to shift the dynamics of our relationship.  I did not fully understand this intention, at the time.  I was content, as I always had been, with dwelling in the midst of Apollon as Despota, Krysaoros, Telchinios and Lykeios.  I thought there would be no need for me to further understand Him as Phoibos (Phoebus, as my Roman Sister had said in the oracle).  But I was wrong.

His brightness is deep and powerful, and incendiary.  It is also warm and compassionate.  I think that warmth and compassion may have been two of the things most obviously lacking in our relationship.  To say that He has pushed me hard in the seven years that I’ve been exclusively His would be the grossest of understatements.  I have come to love Him in His harshness, to appreciate His care and concern, to revel in His possessiveness, and so now, as those lessons have become so deeply a part of me, He moves toward a new set of lessons, from a different part of Himself.

Like casting a light onto what no longer serves His fullest purposes, He shows me that it is not acceptable for me to become stagnant within His familiar forms.  It is time to move onward, toward Phoibos, to celebrate His light, to see through eyes unclouded.  What I will find there, I do not know.  I couldn’t even venture to guess.  It is dangerous to look directly into the sun, so perhaps my attention is better served by acknowledging that which He illuminates– to turn myself in the direction of His nod, or His gaze.  And perhaps, in so doing, in allowing His light to envelop me, I may In fact better notice my own shadow, casting darkness in my wake.  And perhaps I will learn to understand and accept myself in my totality, for that shadow is a part of me.

Blessed Solstice!

I have had a magnificent last 48 hours.  These two days have seen the arrival of all of my shrine keeping materials that I had packed away in 2013/2014 when I had to get ready for simpler living, as well as some very unexpected Solstice gifts for myself and the kids.

Last month, my daughter expressed to me that she would like to start experimenting with pottery, and this morning someone brought her a little pottery wheel!  I thank this someone, along with Apollon, because He was clearly listening.  The baby got some nice new stimulating toys, and I got a few things that I needed, too.  What a surprise!  I am so, so grateful!

So, now that the shrine accouterment have arrived, I can begin arranging things to Apollon’s liking.  I still have a hard time believing it’s actually happening.  My hands start shaking with joy and excitement when I think about it.  He deserves this, so much.

How is everyone else’s Solstice going?

First Treasury Shrine of Apollon!

Hello, dear readers!  I have finally reached a level of completion on my secret project that allows me to share it with you all!  For what feels like forever, I have wanted and worked toward opening a shrine for Apollon that would be accessible to my community.  Well, I have at last been blessed enough to be able to see that dream become reality!

The First Treasury Shrine of Apollon website is up and running!  It’s kind of bare-bones at the moment, because I just really could not wait any longer to share it with you.  As of now, my Shrine Keeping Services page is up, along with some others, including the Virtual Guestbook, for visitors to leave written offerings to Apollon that I will read aloud before His Shrine.

In a few months, the shrine will be complete enough for me to open to the local public in Corpus Christi, Texas, for veneration, which is the most exciting part for me, as Shrine Keeper.  Facilitating others’ worship of Apollon is all I have ever wanted to do, and now I am able. I have been truly blessed beyond measure, and am so excited to bring my Lord’s shrine into fruition.

Thank you all for your support and encouragement!

Hail Phoibos!